


When Mack Met Quinoa

by sinceresapphire



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-19
Updated: 2015-08-19
Packaged: 2018-04-15 14:58:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4611048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinceresapphire/pseuds/sinceresapphire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I seem to remember an entire year where you had to pretend you liked quinoa."</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Mack Met Quinoa

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by:  
> Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie: [the gang is talking about exes] You know, I wish I could relate, but all my exes are awesome. 
> 
> Lance Hunter: Is that right? I seem to remember an entire year where you had to pretend you liked quinoa. 
> 
> Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie: Yeah. That was a dark time. 
> 
> -Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Face My Enemy"

Mack had just sat down on the couch when a beer bottle appeared in front of his face.

“Mate, you look like hell. Date went that bad?”

Taking the beer from Lance, he sighed.

“Nah man, the date was great and so was she.”

Lance took a seat on the other end of the couch then took a sip of his beer.

“Then what was the problem?”

“Quinoa.”

Lance stared at him.

“What the hell is Quinoa?”

“Apparently, it’s a grain or something that’s all the rage.”

Mack sighed then drank some of the beer.

“It’s disgusting, dude. I don’t recommend it.”

Lance laughed at his friend’s expression.

 xxx

Two weeks later, Lance was dishing up a couple slices of pizza when Mack entered their apartment.

“Hey man, where have you been?”

“Told you earlier, I had another date.”

Lance arched an eyebrow at his roommate.

“With the quinoa lady?”

“You mean, Alexis and yes. She’s great so of course I wanted to see her again.”

“Did you have quinoa again?”

Mack’s frown was enough of an answer and caused him to laugh.

“Seriously mate, how long do you think you will be able to keep this up?”

Grabbing a beer, he removed the lid and took a swig as he ignored his friend.

It’s not like she could keep eating quinoa all the time.

He would just wait it out.

xxx

Mack decided that some deity must hate him for some offense he did in another life; otherwise, how could he explain someone who apparently enjoyed consuming quinoa so much.

The sight of the familiar grain on the table was enough to kick his gag reflex into gear.

Alexis didn’t notice the look on his face.

“I made your favorite side dish, Mack.”

She gestured at the quinoa.

Faking a gracious smile, he couldn’t believe this was happening.

Lance was never going to let him live this down.

xxx

Six months later, Mack didn’t think he could bring himself to eat anymore quinoa.

Lance came wandering into their apartment and seeing his best friend on the couched, couldn’t help grinning.

“Hey mate, how’s it going? Have any quinoa lately?”

He had to dodge a pillow that Mack threw at him with a glare.

“Oh shut up, man.”

Grabbing a couple beers and removing the tops, Lance headed into the living room then handed one to Mack before sitting down on the recliner.

“Tell me the sex is at least good, to make it worth it.”

Mack thought about it for a few moments.

“Not the best but worth pretending I like the shit.”

Lance raised his bottle up in a toast.

“Then that’s all that matters.”

They settled in to watch the latest football match from across the pond.

Lance refused to watch the sport that Americans liked that masqueraded as football but really should be called handegg.

xxx

At the nine month mark, Mack was starting to reconsider if the sex was worth pretending to like quinoa as they haven’t been having much of it lately; the sex, not the quinoa. There was plenty of quinoa to go around.

Even worse was Hunter’s smug grin at his misfortune.

Mack swore he was going get rid of that grin by force-feeding Hunter quinoa if it was the last thing that he did.

One night, he ended up cooking so Mack decided to sneak quinoa into the meal and see how Lance liked it.

Lance of course, was too busy ranted about his on and off again girlfriend, Bobbi, to notice what he was putting in his mouth.

It was only after several bites of the quinoa did Mack see any sign of reaction on Lance’s face.

His brow furrowed as his eyes narrowed while he started to frown.

“What the bloody hell is this?”

Mack wished he had a camera as he tried to hide his grin.

“No. You didn’t, Mack. You didn’t dare.”

“What didn’t I do?”

Lance ignored him as he grabbed his beer and tried to get the taste of quinoa off of his tongue.

xxx

About twelve months after the first date, things came to an end. Alexis decided to take a job offer that had her moving half way around the world and they decided to end on good terms rather than try to make a long distance relationship work.

Mack returned to his apartment feeling bittersweet about the whole thing.

On one hand, he was going to miss her because he enjoyed being with her and who she was as a person but on the other hand, no more pretending to like quinoa.

The first thing he decided was to get rid of the quinoa that was in the cabinets because he had occasionally cooked for her there.

Lance chose that moment to enter the apartment and took one look at him.

“There are other fish in the sea, mate, and they won’t all like quinoa.”


End file.
